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First up as picker was music producer Aina, who gave the six penises dangled in front of her the thoughtful scrutiny of Mary Berry analysing a prize bake.Unfortunately, based on nether regions alone, computer science student Mohammed was the first for the chop – though really, by any sane metric, it should have been the man with an elephant tattoo constructed around his rather large “trunk”.In fact, this epidermal deviant, artist Mattie, was Aina’s final pick.Never has the idea that size matters been lent more depressing credence.“She looked like a model, to be honest, and when we started talking she was so friendly.

She eventually plumped for psychology student Rebecca.

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